Fun Things for Adults to Do/Try
Here's a list of things adults can do in their spare time:
Well, there's sex, you can have sex, sexual intercourse, a quickie, consummate a marriage, couple, copulate, coddle, or commit the act of procreation.
You could be making whoopee, making love, love making, scrogging, slapping skin, or sweating to the oldies.
You could sleep with someone, sleep together, sleep around, fool around, whore around, screw around, or just screw, shag, shank, score, fornicate, fork, pork, pump, poke, plank, pound, boff bonk, bop, bone bang, or boink.
You could be dancing between the sheets, doing the horizontal bop, the horizontal mambo, the prone boogie, or even the hunka-chunka.
You could be humping, bumping, humping and bumping, bumping uglies, the ol' bump and grind, or making the two backed beast.
You could play doctor, hide the salami, hide the sausage, because dammit, it's the most fun you can have with your clothes off.
You could break in a new mattress, or give the old one a workout.
You could be squeaking the springs, annoying the neighbors, or making a big mistake.
You could get them in the sack, get little action, get a little nookie, get a piece of tail, get a piece of ass, get it on, get some, get frisky, get lucky, get laid, get all hot and sticky, or just get it wet, and, I'm not making this up, get a little sticky steak up in this bitch.
You could be mounted, mounting, rutting, breeding, starting a family, pulling the train, slamming the stack. Two for me, none for you.
Not going anywhere for a while? You could turn a trick, or take pity on the poor bastard and give it away.
Happy hammering, hammer, nail, sow your wild oats, lose your virginity, or induce pregnancy the old fashioned way.
Take a roll in the hay, a trip to the tunnel of love, or a trip to paradise if you're taking the scenic route.
Hit a home run, hit the twizzer, knock boots, tap that ass, shoplift the pootie, plunder the booty, count the ceiling tiles, ruin a friendship, or close the scroat.
Do the wild thing, do it, doing it, doing the nasty, the nasty, the old in-out in-out, dip the wick, dip the stick (or if you're with a moron you could stick the dip).
Wet the noodle, check the oil, check the temperature, give her the pork sword injection, or the hot beef injection, depending on your religion.
Or perhaps even commit assault with a vein laden meat pipe (that's my favorite).
You could give in, give it up, go for it, go for the gold, go for the gusto, go for broke, or even go all the way, after all, it is the fastest way to the top.
You could engage in a fluid transfer, relieve some tension, relieve some pressure, or experience a hormonal episode.
It's a labor of love, hanky panky, and as a friend of mine once said "the noblest of all causes".
or....you could just FUCK.
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